Hi, it’s been a month since I’ve wrote on here so it’s time for an update! This semester has been crazy for me as I try to pack it all in before graduation. When I was in high school, I was so ready to get out of there that I didn’t understand when everyone was emotional about the last football game, last dance, last lunch, etc. College is so different. I have created a home here and each “last” breaks my heart.
Earlier in the creation of my blog, I was super open about my anxiety and depression but I don’t really write about it much anymore. Not because it is gone, but I just haven’t been as open I suppose. However, my graduation anxiety has been heavy on me and I wanted to shed some light on it because I feel like many people are in the same boat.
I have always been a type A person with a 5-year plan and when I realized post-grad is much less structured than anything I’ve ever experienced, I kind of panicked. In high school, I always knew I wanted to go to college, and even knew I wanted to go to University of South Carolina my junior year. Once I was accepted my senior year, I had a vision about what life would look like as a USC student.
Post-grad is nothing like that. There is no clear path for you to follow, or instructions for how to do life. Job searches are on a month to month basis, especially in the tourism industry. You don’t have a year to visualize your life, all of the sudden a job is available and you are expected to start immediately. That freaks me out. I’m terrified of the thought of having no idea what city I will live in six months from now. That does not fit into my five year plan.
Another thing about post-grad life that isn’t talked about enough is that you don’t get everything you want. If my job search has taught me anything, it is that I really need to expand my horizons and lower my expectations. I started with a very niche goal in mind- specific type of company, specific city, certain position, pay expectations, and a vision of what my life would look like. Now, I have completely expanded my search into other industries, cities that I have never considered before, and have an understanding that I won’t get my dream job right off the bat.
That is a hard reality for me to cope with to be honest. For the last six years I have been working towards my goal, networking with industry mentors, and putting myself out there assuming that my hard work would give me an immediate payout upon graduation.
If you are like me and aren’t receiving an immediate reward for your hard work upon graduation with your dream job, in your dream city and making a ton of money, don’t get disheartened. Our hard work is not going unnoticed, is not worthless or a waste of time. Although sometimes my anxiety tries to convince me that it is.
My advice for other seniors in this season of waiting and trials is to allocate time to giving your full effort to your job search, but also for living in the moment. I’ve really tried my best to not let my anxiety about the future keep me from going to bingo or kickball with my friends. Making time for career planning, school, part time jobs, and social life is exhausting, so you have to be sure to not run yourself into the ground either. Take naps, silence your thoughts with a book, or start a passion project. These distractions and fun moments soaking in my last days with my friends are the only things keeping my fire lit.
One thing that I keep asking myself is: What is the next right thing? Not for the fall, not for next year, but for right now.
My Post-Grad Plans
For me, the next right thing is a summer leadership position with Moondance Adventures. I am so stoked to be leading 7th and 8th graders on adventure trips throughout British Columbia. My co-leader and I will lead 3 trips throughout the summer, each 2 weeks long with different groups of 12 middle schoolers. We will get to do so many fun things: white water rafting, surfing, kayaking, hiking and rappelling. I can’t wait to spend the summer immersing in nature, working and playing hard, and being both a mentor and a friend to these kids. This is something that I have wanted to do since I traveled on a similar trip when I was 16 years old.
I begin my staff training a week after graduation in May and I am nervous but so excited! I can’t wait to meet leaders who have such similar interests and energy as myself. Since my summer will be spent camping in Canada, I will be unplugging from everything. Leaders submit trip updates to be posted on Moondance’s website so since you won’t hear from me, check there to hear about my adventures!
As for what I am doing in the fall, I’m not sure yet! I have been applying to so many full-time jobs I may even write a blog post on my application strategy soon.
I hope that sharing my anxieties about graduation made you feel less alone, it felt good to write it.
